Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Time to Get Earthy

What do you get when you combine an 8 foot deep hole, 20 Texas teenagers, and an "earthy" smell? A new septic system for our clinic in Camanchaj, of course.
Up until last week, our old "septic system" consisted of about 6 very deep holes scattered around the clinic. Well, as you may remember, we finally ran out of space in those holes a week after the preschool opened last January (picture this: "Yeah kids!!! Welcome to preschool. Just a quick note before we start learning, please don't play in the human waste. Not pretty). Anyway, with lots of hard work and generous donations from churches in the States, we've now installed a brand-new Water/Waste Treatment System (they don't like for me to call it a septic system, which of course it is.)
What started as nothing more than another hole on clinic grounds...


...became a fully-functioning Water/Waste Treatment System!


Now somebody go flush a toilet and let's see if this thing works.

While the youth did all the grunt work (yes, we did bust one of the septic lines while digging - dinner's on!), the adult chaperones got freaky with the preschool kids.
The thing that got us in this mess (pun intended) in the first place, was the fact that not many of our Mayan patients at the clinic know how to properly use a toilet. How would you if you didn't grow up using one or have one at home? Needless to say, a lot of "foreign objects," including newspaper and other items get flushed down our commodes. Thanks to some artsy Texas teens, we tried to educate the public (see above.)

Here's the proud artist next to her "community education" paintings. Beware, #2 is kind of graphic.
I never thought I'd say this, but it's a huge blessing to be able to flush a toilet without fear.
God Bless Texas!
Peace,
Jay

Friday, July 17, 2009

Vigilante Justice


We had some big news in our little town early this week when a "mob" of people torched the car of some suspected kidnappers. As I was walking to the market yesterday I saw a burned up car sitting in the middle of the road. I thought nothing of it (hey, this IS Guatemala), until I saw that same car on the front page of one of our national newspapers the following day (I use "news" loosely when referring to the Diario, which is more like the National Enquirer than the New York Times).
Here's the scoop as far as I can tell: 4 young men tried to rob and kidnap a local chicken vendor. Fortunately for them, they were caught doing this by the Panajachel police and not the locals of Panajachel. I say fortunately because if the locals would have caught the men, what's left of them would likely be sitting charred in their car, which was set on fire soon after the police left the scene. Quite a lot of drama for Pana in one day!
I don't want to make any broad generalizations here, but there are times in Guatemala when locals, especially in the smaller villages, choose to take justice into their own hands. It seems that many Guatemalans do not trust that the authorities will handle matters properly when it comes to crime. On this day, the bad-guys car was just torched, but earlier this year, in the village where we work (Camanchaj), a couple of thieves were caught, beaten, and burned to death. On the upside, there's not much crime in the smaller villages, as you can imagine. However, one could also raise a pretty strong argument against such swift justice, especially when the suspects turn out to be innocent, as I'm sure has been the case on more than one occasion.
Not that I think any of this matters to the Diario, who I think is just happy to put another burning car or bloody body on the front of their paper...
UPDATE...
I just found out today (Saturday) from my friend in town that the car the locals burned up was actually the car of the man who was kidnapped! Doh! Talk about a goof-up in vigilante "justice." Oh well, we in Pana never claimed to be the brightest people, we just live in the most beautiful place. : )
Peace,
Jay

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

The Widowmaker

In honor of the late, great pitchman Billy Mays, let me introduce you to a product even he would have a hard time selling...
It's an absolute breakthrough of modern technology and ingenuity! You won't find it in your local Bed, Bath and Beyond, no sir, this baby can only be purchased in the finest developing nations. It's the electric showerhead!! Now I know what you're thinking, "Billy, why would someone mix electricity and water? Didn't mom always say to not bring a toaster with us into the tub?" Yes, but this little water-warming friend is different! As long as you very carefully avoid touching any of the exposed wires or metal parts, electricity won't pass through your body as you stand in 2" of water! It's genius! And what's best is if you call now, I'll throw in our newest product, the diesel-powered toilet! You'll never be constipated again! You get all of this for only 5 easy payments of $19.95!!!

The gringos here call it the "widowmaker." Carey and I just moved into a smaller place to save money, and we're lucky enough to have one. Notice the exposed wires and strange antenna on the side (what the heck is that thing for?) Day one in shower: I reach up to change the setting and get the shock of my life. Needless to say, I let slip a few non-approved words for missionaries.

In other news...
As medical team coordinator, I'm often put in the situation of having to ask dumb questions of my team leaders like, "What's the difference between a vaginal speculum and a vaginal specula?" (one is just the plural of the other. Duh, Jay). One thing I love about this job though is the creativity of the doctors we bring down. Last week I told one of our docs that we don't have any ring forceps for him to use when he is giving gynecological exams to our female patients. He says, in true rural clinic fashion, "Don't worry, I'll just use disposable chopsticks and rubber bands."
I'll let your imagination take it from there... ; )
Peace,
Jay